Letters to God (Self)

labored heavy breathing my lungs collapsed in my body and I had the need to suck in air at every moment that passes and I'm unable to satify this hunger for oxygen
so I turn blue
my flesh is purple and blue from lack of health blood flow
and this is how I feel about you
inconsiderate of my feelings always put yourself first, expect me to do the same
you cant see any abuses because your eyes are focused on yourself.
I need so much space
your laugh creeps me the wrong way
DIEGO!!!!! I'm so angry with you I could shake you, slap you into reality
I'm tired of holding you like a child
tired like a vieja doing 40 years of hard labor
i can't live with you I can't live with you
you've got this image of who you are in your head
far from reality
still have more to learn
about being compassionate
to those around you
and I am not your mother. My flesh is black and blue
you don't notice anything, stuck in your own head/world
I don't matter until it is convinient and I am exhausted
from carrying you last semester
while you watched somewhere from a distance
in a cloud of bullshit gullonty and bliss
while I bore the reality of my not-as-privileged life.
You can't even agknowlege how spoiled you are,
don't even realize your whiteness
how you invade and conquer,
take over
my brown and selfless truth
to become disposible at your will
I exist without you.
That's why I'M Frida
and Diego hardly exists without her.